A Poem About How Women Should Stop Dieting

I wrote on Facebook the other day, asking – rhetorically, of course – why being happy always seemed to lead to me gaining weight. I joked that I wanted to find some way to lie to my body that I was miserable. Ha ha.

Later, though, I thought about what I’d said. What’s wrong with me, that being happy is kind of a bad thing simply because I’ve gained five pounds. No one even knows that but me. And, certainly, no one cares. What is this internal tyranny over women that suckers even a (I like to think) conscious woman into putting body size and general happiness on equal planes. Would I really rather be sad and skinny than happy and fat? Isn’t that sick?

Coincidentally (or, as I view it, serendipitously) I watched a YouTube video on the health benefits of eating one meal a day. Many Muslims also advise one meal a day. Many Buddhist monks recommend one meal a day. Trying this for a while could be a way to not only lose the “happy pounds” and further improve my health, but, more importantly, to spend less time preparing food and washing dishes. There are other things I’d rather be doing. The weight itself no longer matters to me. There are too many critical issues going on in our society for anybody – especially any intelligent being – to be wasting time worrying about five or ten pounds.

The Divine Feminine is needed now more than ever. With the separation and categorization of people into little groups to oppress and demonize. With our health care system at the hands of a Twitter-junkie who cares for no one but himself. With our planet heating up, and our water supply drying up. We need Woke Women everywhere to be about it.

This poem is primarily a reminder to myself. It is also an invitation to other people – especially all who identify with the Feminine Spirit – to use your talents, your voices, your bodies, your minds, and your spirits to uplift the planet.

So, here it is…

Die It

They asked her

which she’d rather have,

sexy steamy night

with stranger,

or

sweet, easy piece of

dreamy cheesecake.

Surprised

I was not

when, of course,

devilish dessert

earned her body’s lust.

Deprived of carnal passion –

no woman ever,

but fashion,

commercialized, capricious eyes,

and masculine wish for

sole supremacy,

Reduce

sunshine-colored pink topped cupcake

to armed adversary, scary

fat-throwing attacker.

Beauteous baby building digs

Decreased

not by accurate concern for

maternal magic, but

Fear

of feminine largesse.

The best most can expect –

five to ten pounds

Less?

While fleshy souls,

Lost,

scream soundlessly inside

cells bereaved, in need –

not of packaged poison

in food clothing – but

Insurrection, mutiny

This is me!

Head to knee,

ass to feet,

take the scale and weigh

the mass of heart

as I love you

squeeze you

high into sunset sky

build up this ball of blue

till it cools

the winds of ill will

killing it through and through.

Weigh

the song I sing to

little ones wondering

why we won’t willify what we want

when so much to do

goes undone

Wasted

time, dieting to hide

the light this world is pining for,

Eat.

And eat well,

Gas for the next phase

of feminine triumph

Please don’t buy into

Diets,

Goddess, your one-pointed

Presence is Spirit’s imperative Essence.

 

 

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Today started with an amazing high. I got on the scale and discovered that I’d hit my goal weight! I’m 5’4’ and finally hit 125 lbs. I had been at 136/137 for about a year, and had latched on to the number 134 for several years before that. There’s nothing wrong with any of those numbers, of course, but I didn’t feel like my best self. This new number I haven’t seen in years! Perhaps it’s due to my vegan (technically vegetarian, since I eat egg whites) lifestyle, which I started on November 20, 2015. Perhaps it’s due to my break-up, and not going out to eat every weekend. Whatever it is, I’m grateful. And I treated myself to a gym membership – Planet Fitness – in order to maintain my achievement. (Here are some pictures of: the free stuff they gave me when I joined the gym, the beautiful salad I had for lunch, and a narcissistic selfie).

Free stuff! Yay!
Free stuff! Yay!
Cilantro, tomatoes, onion, cucumber, lemon juice, rice vinegar. All organic. Mmm!
Cilantro, celery, tomatoes, onion, cucumber, lemon juice, rice vinegar. All organic. Mmm!
Feeling accomplished!
Feeling accomplished!

But then, after my workout, something happened when I stopped by the grocery store. While I was waiting to check out, two guys were ahead of me in line. One of the guys pocketed a bag of candy. What?! I haven’t seen a grown man steal, maybe ever – certainly not in recent memory. I considered telling the cashier, but he was a jovial guy and was very friendly with the two guys. I doubted he would do anything. My initial feeling was anger. But then it made me feel really sad. I couldn’t figure out why at first.

Then, I realized that people who steal must feel no sense of hope. Perhaps they feel that the only way they can have what they want in life is to take it from someone else. What a depressing mindset. Perhaps there’s also a sense of entitlement. This person wanted what they wanted. That’s all that mattered, not right and wrong.  It reminded me of how I felt when an ex told me that he regularly stole little bottles of water from the bookstore of the spiritual center where he worked. It wasn’t the water that bothered me. They were only $1.00, and sometimes the clerk would allow staff members to take freebies. What bothered me was his justification – “They don’t pay me what I’m worth anyway. They should just be grateful to have me.” My heart sank. Though I stayed with him for several months after that, it was a little piece of The End. Whatever the justification, this kind of attitude is a virtual guarantee of either poverty, or the fearful insecurity that comes with poverty. Rich people who cheat and steal have no more peace of mind than the average petty thief on the street.

I think there is a link between this type of attitude and low self-esteem. People who truly value themselves know that there’s always enough. There is no need to take anything from somebody else. People who truly value themselves value others; they do not want to hurt others in any way, certainly not by stealing. People who truly value themselves know that character is a currency. Unlike money, which is gained and lost all the time, character is priceless and impossible to lose, except through one’s own actions. The Bible says “The one who gets wisdom loves life; the one who cherishes understanding will soon prosper” (Proverbs 19:8).  I take this to imply, “Don’t waste your life chasing after what you want. Become the kind of person who understands it, who embodies it, who deserves it. Then, it will come to you.”

In other news, I just began a 6-month internship with a literary agency. I’m helping them review new submissions and learning all I can. I love it! Also (thanks to my sister) someone expressed interest in hanging my art work in his restaurant. I have yet to work out the details, and see where this lead takes me, but I’m excited. And I plan to continue working on my new script this week. My personal life had overshadowed my work for a few weeks. But, now, since I have my trusty outline, I should be able to get back on track easily.

Life is good.

Happy Easter, Eostara, Spring Equinox!

 

Raven